Author Topic: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni  (Read 840118 times)

0 Members and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline Joshuasm32

  • LV4 Regular (Next: 200)
  • ****
  • Posts: 142
  • Rating: +19/-7
    • View Profile
    • Network
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3570 on: April 27, 2013, 01:59:21 pm »
#4626: You carry a stack of about 90 something sheets of paper covered in hex and sprite codes, a TI-84 Plus SE manual, a notebook of paper scribbled with code sprite/hex code, and a TI-84 Plus SE calculator around with you, wherever you go, without any shame at all!   XD
« Last Edit: April 27, 2013, 02:00:13 pm by codebender »
My name is Josh and I a developer at Moonzean. I enjoy Radiohead, web development, Java, and cryptograms.
Spoiler For No Surprises, by Radiohead:
A heart that's full up like a landfill
A job that slowly kills you
Bruises that won't heal

You look so tired unhappy
Bring down the government
They don't, they don't speak for us

I'll take a quiet life
A handshake of carbon monoxide

And no alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
Silent, silent

This is my final fit
My final bellyache

With no alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises please

Such a pretty house
And such a pretty garden

No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises please

Offline Darl181

  • «Yo buddy, you still alive?»
  • CoT Emeritus
  • LV12 Extreme Poster (Next: 5000)
  • *
  • Posts: 3408
  • Rating: +305/-13
  • VGhlIEdhbWU=
    • View Profile
    • darl181.webuda.com
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3571 on: April 27, 2013, 02:14:41 pm »
4627: You have a few of these laying around
Edit: and they have stories to them, too. Ie for this one, the binder's been in pieces a couple of times. One of the times was during class - the cardboard that makes the cover stiff came out, and a bunch of people wrote on it for some reason..now that's sealed in for posterity ;D
« Last Edit: April 27, 2013, 02:23:42 pm by Darl181 »
Vy'o'us pleorsdti thl'e gjaemue

Offline Joshuasm32

  • LV4 Regular (Next: 200)
  • ****
  • Posts: 142
  • Rating: +19/-7
    • View Profile
    • Network
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3572 on: April 27, 2013, 02:21:44 pm »
LOL!   XD
My name is Josh and I a developer at Moonzean. I enjoy Radiohead, web development, Java, and cryptograms.
Spoiler For No Surprises, by Radiohead:
A heart that's full up like a landfill
A job that slowly kills you
Bruises that won't heal

You look so tired unhappy
Bring down the government
They don't, they don't speak for us

I'll take a quiet life
A handshake of carbon monoxide

And no alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
Silent, silent

This is my final fit
My final bellyache

With no alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises please

Such a pretty house
And such a pretty garden

No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises please

Offline Sorunome

  • Fox Fox Fox Fox Fox Fox Fox!
  • Support Staff
  • LV13 Extreme Addict (Next: 9001)
  • *************
  • Posts: 7920
  • Rating: +374/-13
  • Derpy Hooves
    • View Profile
    • My website! (You might lose the game)
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3573 on: April 28, 2013, 01:41:24 am »
l-o-l
that is too funny :P
4628: You go on omni during vacation (true story)

THE GAME
Also, check out my website
If OmnomIRC is screwed up, blame me!
Click here to give me an internet!

Offline Darl181

  • «Yo buddy, you still alive?»
  • CoT Emeritus
  • LV12 Extreme Poster (Next: 5000)
  • *
  • Posts: 3408
  • Rating: +305/-13
  • VGhlIEdhbWU=
    • View Profile
    • darl181.webuda.com
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3574 on: April 28, 2013, 02:21:11 am »
4627: You code while on vacation.
4628: You participate in the yearly omni contests while on vacation.

(convenient: ~3/4 of Illinois seems to be flat country road :P tho the CTA system was kind of useful as well)
Vy'o'us pleorsdti thl'e gjaemue

Offline TIfanx1999

  • ಠ_ಠ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  • CoT Emeritus
  • LV13 Extreme Addict (Next: 9001)
  • *
  • Posts: 6173
  • Rating: +191/-9
    • View Profile
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3575 on: April 28, 2013, 02:42:33 am »
#4626: You carry a stack of about 90 something sheets of paper covered in hex and sprite codes, a TI-84 Plus SE manual, a notebook of paper scribbled with code sprite/hex code, and a TI-84 Plus SE calculator around with you, wherever you go, without any shame at all!   XD
4629: ??? You wonder why anyone would consider this shameful.

Offline tr1p1ea

  • LV7 Elite (Next: 700)
  • *******
  • Posts: 647
  • Rating: +110/-0
    • View Profile
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3576 on: April 28, 2013, 07:36:23 am »
4630: You had a colour LCD on your calc before the 84+CSE!
"My world is Black & White. But if I blink fast enough, I see it in Grayscale."


Offline Joshuasm32

  • LV4 Regular (Next: 200)
  • ****
  • Posts: 142
  • Rating: +19/-7
    • View Profile
    • Network
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3577 on: April 28, 2013, 08:15:20 am »
Quote
4629:  You wonder why anyone would consider this shameful.
It would make you feel like a tacky nerd, if you weren't addicted!   :P
My name is Josh and I a developer at Moonzean. I enjoy Radiohead, web development, Java, and cryptograms.
Spoiler For No Surprises, by Radiohead:
A heart that's full up like a landfill
A job that slowly kills you
Bruises that won't heal

You look so tired unhappy
Bring down the government
They don't, they don't speak for us

I'll take a quiet life
A handshake of carbon monoxide

And no alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
Silent, silent

This is my final fit
My final bellyache

With no alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises please

Such a pretty house
And such a pretty garden

No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises please

Offline Rhombicuboctahedron

  • LV6 Super Member (Next: 500)
  • ******
  • Posts: 437
  • Rating: +41/-6
    • View Profile
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3578 on: April 28, 2013, 10:34:13 am »
This is where I keep mine
http://ourl.ca/4889;msg=267974

Offline Sorunome

  • Fox Fox Fox Fox Fox Fox Fox!
  • Support Staff
  • LV13 Extreme Addict (Next: 9001)
  • *************
  • Posts: 7920
  • Rating: +374/-13
  • Derpy Hooves
    • View Profile
    • My website! (You might lose the game)
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3579 on: April 28, 2013, 12:17:38 pm »
4631: You post in this thread
4632: We repeat stuffs in here. A lot.

THE GAME
Also, check out my website
If OmnomIRC is screwed up, blame me!
Click here to give me an internet!

Offline Rhombicuboctahedron

  • LV6 Super Member (Next: 500)
  • ******
  • Posts: 437
  • Rating: +41/-6
    • View Profile
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3580 on: April 28, 2013, 12:50:25 pm »
5034: You correct the numbering
5035: We repeat stuffs in here. A lot.

Spoiler For Proof:
116- When you use a bricked calculator as weight on papers.
117- The best thing you done during your calculator usage was avoiding bricking it.
116- You fall into severe depression if you have to go for more than 24 hours without using a calc or visiting omni.
117- You have a backup of you calculator data with you at all times in case you crash your calc and lose all data

+2
165: You have the ROMs of every calculator made by TI
166: You customize the run indicator to display a rickroll
165 - You printed calc84maniac z80 assembly instruction set
166 - You beg your friend with a TI-89 Titanium to let you put a GB emulator on it
+2
312: You brute forced the admin password to your parents computers to get into Omnimaga :)
320:You spell Nazi as not(c
-7
441. When on a different computer, you often accidentally search for 'O' because you just pressed O Enter.
441 (moving back one) (referring to #440): In a few days, all your friends' computers also autocomplete "o" to omnimaga.org.
442. You modified your calc to handle a full colored WXGA ldc screen that is the same size as the nspire producing 16k colors. (that would be awesome)
442. You break into TI's headquarters and steal all of their secret documents
+2
476:  we have our internet browser up all day on omnimaga, on the day of an axe update.
478: You code your own OS for the calculator :)
-1
486: You're overjoyed when you find the link cable you lost almost a year ago. :P
486. xkcd is law.
+1
545.  Your local restaurant knows that for you "Netham" = "Lobster".  :P
Quote from: willrandship
545: When you go to a fancy restaurant and order Lobster, the waiter looks at you funny when you ask him why it's the wrong color :P
+1
Quote from: apcalc
689. You've looked at this thread even once. :P
Quote from: Homer-16
688. You are counting down the posts on this thread hoping to get the 1000th sign.
+2
Quote from: Angelfish
746: You've rewired your calculator's processor to not only understand Binary, but also Ternary, Quaternary, Decimal, and pure Hex.
Quote from: Deep Thought
746: All answers to math problems are in the range 0 to 255.99609375.
+1
Quote from: schmibs
753: 79 6f 75 27 72 65 20 73 6f 20 75 73 65 64 20 74 6f 20 23 37 34 37 20 74 68 61 74 20 74 68 65 20 74 72 61 6e 73 6c 61 74 6f 72 20 69 73 20 79 6f 75 72 20 6e 75 6d 62 65 72 20 6f 6e 65 20 62 6f 6f 6b 6d 61 72 6b
Quote from: Angelfish
753: 89 11 11 17 32 10 71 10 11 11 19 32 11 61 04 97 11 63 21 16 10 41 05 11 53 21 05 11 51 10 39 11 63 21 19 11 41 05 11 61 16 10 11 10 32 10 51 10 32 72 10 11 20 44 32 98 11 71 16 32 10 51 10 11 51 16 10 19 71 00 32 10 51 10 32 68 10 19 91 05 10 99 71 08
+1
Quote from: Darl181
808: You've noticed this list is getting close to 42 pages.
Quote from: qazz42
808: You have your teacher get mad at you by having the connect-to=class thing for the nspire, for free...
+1
Quote from: Juju
838. You actually answer 42 for everything that needs an answer.
Quote from: Darl181
840: You have this (http://www.ticalc.org/archives/files/fileinfo/405/40547.html) program
-1
Quote from: Sircmpwn
944. You have considered locking this thread as it nears 1000 so you can have the 1000th thing.
Quote from: Darl181
943: You never say calculator unless you're talking with some n00b at school...you always say "calc"
+2
Quote from: Deep Thought
1162: You get confused whenever you type on a computer keyboard because you can't get letters to display in capitals.
Quote from: holmes221b
1162: You can't wait to show off your calc programming skills to your grandparents tomorrow (aka Christmas Day).
+1
Quote from: Deep Thought
1256: This also applies to every other thread in the forum.
Quote from: holmes221b
1256: You read IRC logs even when it's not your spare time.
+1
Quote from: Juju
1279: You run a particle simulator on the calc you simulated in Minecraft, which you simulated with a calc you simulated with rocks.
Quote from: Deep Thought
1279: You simulate rocks with your calc x.x
+1
Quote from: Juju
1473: You repeat stuff already said in this thread.
Quote from: Deep Thought
1472: You don't repeat anything said here.
+2
Quote from: Freyaday
1527: You actually considered using some of the lines from 1526
Quote from: ingalls
1527: You've used some of the lines from 1526
+1
Quote from: Juju
1573: Your ears bleed when you listened to the video.
Quote from: Binder News
1573: You don't allow you mother to cook lobsters for fear of revenge from Netham45
+1
Quote from: Freyaday
1577: You number your posts in anticipation
Quote from: Darl181
1577: You got tired of figuring out the post background color so you put them in your sig.
+1
Quote from: Hayleia
1675: You say "ERR:Syntax" instead of "spelling mistake"
1675 bis: you say "Pause 108000" instead of "Wait a minute"
+1
Quote from: Compynerd255
1679: You write an ASM Hex program to solve a problem on the SAT.
Quote from: ruler501
1674: you go crazy when unable to browse omni for 3 days
+6
Quote from: p2
1815: You think you're very stupid becauase you don't know why 16384 :P
Quote from: p2
1819: You're happy that you aren't stupid any longer and that you know it now.
-3
Quote from: Homer-16
1846: Your post count would be about 10x more than it is now if they did :P
Quote from: Deep Thought
1846: Your post count is already ten times more than it is now.
+1
Quote from: Art_of_camelot
1859: You've learned how not to loose the game.
Quote from: Darl181
1848: You have a pink USB cable.
+12
Quote from: Freyaday
1863: You leave Easter Eggs in your signs.
Quote from:  Art_of_camelot
1876: You've fixed the count in this thread at least once./me looks in Darl181's general direction... <_<
-13
Quote from: Homer-16
1962: Messing up the numbering has no effect on you :P
Quote from: Hayleia
1962: You mess it up back.
+1
Quote from: Homer-16
2004: You've corrected the numbering at least once :P
Quote from: flyingfisch
2004: you've corrected it back
+1
Quote from:  flyingfisch
2016: you glare at homer-16 for correcting you
2016: you say someone can go ahead with 2017 now
+1   
Quote from: Darl181
2025: You always spell numbar like that, as well as #963
2025: You couldn't find the pink USB cable you were looking for, but you found a white USB cable and drew on that instead.
+1
Quote from: Homer=16
2182: That's where you learned it was Programmers' Day September 12th.
Quote from:  flyingfisch
2181: You all ready knew about dream in code
+2
Quote from: flyingfisch
2186: your calc goes in yuor pocket at lunch. thats where the candy wrappers come from.
Quote from: Freyaday
2186: Your calc doesn't go in your pocket at lunch (supar true!!!!one)
Quote from: Yeong
2227: You have 10+ calculators in a school bag ;D
Quote from: flyingfisch
2227: you have 80 BASIC progs on your calc that you forgot to delete, or thought you might use. (true)
+1
Quote from: Yeong
2279: D:\ is depressing
Quote from: parserp
2279: you find out that fisch is flyingfisch's last name. :P
+1
Quote from: Stefan Bauwens
2291: You want to be a lobster too.
Quote from: Freyaday
2291: You handwrite so fast your calligraphy contains typos
+1
Quote from: Homer-16
2328: You go off to start spamming :trollface:
Quote from: Stefan Bauwens
2328: You start trying everything out.
+1
Quote from: Darl181
2354: You start fantasizing about if you had items from calc games IRL/me fires some bouncers around the thread and scampers
Quote from: parserp
2354: the only thing on your "wish list" is a calc
Quote from: Yeong
2395: You do: Batteries.
-38
Quote from: Freyaday
2408: You started the topic that spawned D: (yes, that was me! Whoo! I feel important now!)
Quote from: ben_g
2408:This link has been spreading in your school (It's not a rickroll, it's worse). (
&feature=related)
+1
Quote from: aeTIos
2411: You are disappointed that it does not work
Quote from: AngelFish
2411: Instead of digging through nested spoilers, you just click "Quote".
+1
Quote from: Yeong
2440: Half of your TI-84+SE's memory is belong to music.
Quote from: Freyaday
2241: You have the converters.
+200
Quote from: Yeong
2274: Your teacher already gave up and doesn't even care anymore :P
Quote from: Freyaday
2274: Your teacher knew from the beginning it was a battle that could not be won
+1
Quote from: Jonius7
2285: But to get trophies on your profile

2283: Your substitute for games is instead to post and chat on omnimaga
+3
Quote from: Freyaday
2324: You remember that it includes addiction to Omni as well
Quote from: boot2490
2324: You didn't even think about it to remember because you are literally constantly thinking about Omnimaga. (Sadly, almost true :/)
+1
Quote from: parserp
2338: Freyaday loves catgirls :P
2239: I got the new page :P
+100
Quote from: Homer-16
2265: You make a program that runs in Axe and Grammar
Quote from: hellninjas
2265: You, instead of using the space bar, type %20.
+1
Quote from: Hayleia
2338:You use the same method to get 9001 right now :D
Quote from: turiqwalrus
2239: you knew Hayleia couldn't because there's a post size limit of 65535 characters
+100
Quote from: Yeong
2256: You once blocked memory menu with MirageOS, making teacher badly pissed
Quote from: Hayleia
2356: You don't care because you have 2 other calcs in your bag, and they are worst than the one the teacher took away.
-99
Quote from: ruler501
2369: you know exactly what 2368 is about
Quote from: Yeong
2470:ruler's avatar changes.
-100
Quote from: BalancedFury
2492: You have met everyone in the Omni community even though they are far away in pop tart lands :P
Quote from: Juju
2393: You're actually the one who sent 2390 to Freyaday
+100
Quote from: Juju
2400: You believe 2395 has already been written while writing 2395.
Quote from: Darl181
2313: We repeat stuffs in here. A lot./me runs
+88
Quote from: parserp
2328: C and K :P
Quote from:  Freyaday
2328:jk
Quote from: Juju
2417: Once again, restoring the count correctly. I think. It messed up lots of time before.
-88
Quote from: Homer-16
2435: You know it comes in waves
Quote from: Freyaday
2454: Like the ocean!
-19
Quote from: Juju
2468: You have an even bigger banhammer.
Quote from: Freyaday
2467: You banhammered someone away irl (true)
+2
Quote from: parserp
2475: you are TBO's bro :P
Quote from: ben_g
2475: When you have to decide something, but don't know what you should choose, you let your calc generate a random number instead of tossing a coin (true).
+1
Quote from: flyingfisch
2488: you subscribed to the omni RSS feed so you could be the first to know about new posts
Quote from: Homer-16
2485: You use the post notifier program
+4
Quote from: Juju
2549: Omnimaga manages to appear 2 times.
Quote from: Hayleia
2549: (true) The teacher wrote "Un ressort avec N spires" on the board (talking about a spring, in French) and that was not even me that noticed first, but one of my friends told me "Hey, it's a Nspire spring !"
+1
Quote from: Homer-16
2745: You have MLP content in your profile even if you've never watched the show :P
Quote from: piexil
2745: Your nerdiest friends bash on you for loving you calculator so much, saying "It's just a calculator"
+1
Quote from: turiqwalrus
2749: you have pretty much the oldest programmable calculator
Quote from: blue_bear_94
2746: You stay on Omni even if you hate MLP
+4
Quote from: ruler501
2755: you considered begging for a computer section
Quote from: Sorunome
2856: You ask thousands of times for a computer section
-100
Quote from: Darl181
2863: Your sig does not contain "the game" in a big font, rather it's hidden somewhere.
Quote from: blue_bear_94
2862: You say "I lost the game" on every post
+2
Quote from: Darl181
2867: You use words like Ourl and Peanut as proper nouns
Quote from: Sorunome
2878: You try to bring as many people as possible to omnimaga
-10
Quote from: blue_bear_94
2889: You have your personal office for calc programming.
Quote from: Sorunome
2889: You manage to lose constantly, even thought it's against the rules (30 min pause)
+1
Quote from: Freyaday
2906: You can't find your calc, and now you're depressed.
Quote from: TheMachine02
2906 : your pc crash and you can't connect to omnimaga, so you borrow the pc of your little brother
+1
Quote from: Sorunome
3257: You already noticed that ages ago
Quote from: p2
3253: You still remember the older avatars of almost everyone
+5
Quote from: pimathbrainiac
3672: you ask why that number persistently.
Quote from: epic7
3672: You know that your number is divisible by 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 8, 9, 12, 17, 18, 24, 27, 34, 36, 51, 54, 68, 72, 102, 108, 136, 153, 204, 216, 306, 408, 459, 612, 918, 1224, 1836, and 3672
+1
Quote from: Freyaday
3735: The powers of two are the only round numbers.
Quote from: Sorunome
3735: You count in binary
+1
Quote from: blue_bear_94
3813: You didn't.
Quote from: Sorunome
3812: You bought more paper only to print this topic
+2
Quote from: Streetwalker
3974 : You break your friends' calcs "accidentally". (true story)
3980 : If you find a lost calc, you reset the memory and put your stuff on it. :P
-5
Quote from: epic7
4233. After all that time, you couldn't come up with a good name
Quote from: Sorunome
4233: You suggest lisa
+1
Quote from: Juju
4282: You get featured on the national radio? o.o
Quote from: Sorunome
4293: You got featured on erm... D:/me runs
-10
Quote from: Freyaday
4326: You invented true story brackets. (Possibly a true story)
Quote from: epic7
4326: You use true story square brackets [true story]
+1
Quote from: willrandship
4344: You screw with people by editing these posts.
Quote from: Homer-16
4344: You glare at willrandship
+1
Quote from: Rhombicuboctahedron
4388: You use "you" when you really mean "I"
Quote from: Sorunome
4388: THE GAME
+1
Quote from: Sorunome
4534: You also read that on your own programs and thought that they were thus outputting wrong stuff (true story)
Quote from: nikitouzz
4534 : because the game
+1
Quote from: blue_bear_94
4583: You already passed AP Calc BC (true story)
Quote from: ElementCoder
4583: You will wait until omnimaga finishes loading, even though your internet is terribly slow :(
+1
Quote from: pimathbrainiac
4603: You know where #4601 came from
Quote from: Sorunome
4603: You read all the signs since the last time you posted (true story)
+1
Quote from: Dapianokid
4788: when THIS http://ourl.ca/18637
4779: When your W's are alternating capitalization.
+10
Quote from: epic7
4784: You notice that Dapianokid forgot to add "(true story)" to his last 3 signs
Quote from: Dapianokid
4784: when you play Rachmaninoffs Preludes for real. (true story, friend :) )
+1
Quote from: Rhombicuboctahedron
4795: You quote Homer-16, go up to “author=” and change the name
Quote from: Sorunome
4596: You rickroll people in school (true story)
+200
Quote from: Sorunome
4628: You go on omni during vacation (true story)
Quote from: Darl181
4627: You code while on vacation.
+2
895 forward
494 backward
895-494=401

Offline epic7

  • Chopin!
  • LV11 Super Veteran (Next: 3000)
  • ***********
  • Posts: 2200
  • Rating: +135/-8
  • I like robots
    • View Profile
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3581 on: April 28, 2013, 01:10:03 pm »
5036: You fall to your knees and gaze upon Rhombicuboctahedron's corrections in awe.

Offline Streetwalrus

  • LV12 Extreme Poster (Next: 5000)
  • ************
  • Posts: 3821
  • Rating: +80/-8
    • View Profile
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3582 on: April 28, 2013, 01:58:55 pm »
5037 : You second that. ^

Offline Hooloovoo

  • LV5 Advanced (Next: 300)
  • *****
  • Posts: 225
  • Rating: +22/-0
    • View Profile
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3583 on: April 28, 2013, 06:08:34 pm »
(convenient: ~3/4 of Illinois seems to be flat country road :P tho the CTA system was kind of useful as well)
Actually, it's more like all of Illinois. :P
"My world is Black & White. But if I blink fast enough, I see it in Grayscale." -tr1p1ea
Spoiler For some of the calcs I own:



(actually I have quite a few more than this, but I don't feel like making bars for them all.)

Offline Joshuasm32

  • LV4 Regular (Next: 200)
  • ****
  • Posts: 142
  • Rating: +19/-7
    • View Profile
    • Network
Re: 9001 signs you're addicted to calcs and Omni
« Reply #3584 on: April 28, 2013, 06:31:59 pm »
#[I DON'T EVEN KNOW ANY MORE!]: What on earth?  This is just getting weird...   <_<
My name is Josh and I a developer at Moonzean. I enjoy Radiohead, web development, Java, and cryptograms.
Spoiler For No Surprises, by Radiohead:
A heart that's full up like a landfill
A job that slowly kills you
Bruises that won't heal

You look so tired unhappy
Bring down the government
They don't, they don't speak for us

I'll take a quiet life
A handshake of carbon monoxide

And no alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
Silent, silent

This is my final fit
My final bellyache

With no alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises please

Such a pretty house
And such a pretty garden

No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises please