(Warning... this is a long rant.)
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Why the fuck is it that EVERY time my life is about to finally be perfect, someone or something fucks it up?
As some of you know, I was supposed to move out and live with Suki (my girlfriend) this summer.

Well, last night (at 3 fucking AM) she calls me... and 3 hours later... I'm lying in bed, wondering why I can't just die already. (after puking my intestines out)
Suki broke up with me again. In the end, she gave the reason of "I feel like I'd have a better chance at succeeding in life if I didn't have this."
Yet, upon asking her what things will be like after this, she replies with "I guess the same as usual."

Now, if NOTHING changes but the fact that I don't want to live anymore, and her maybe crying for a bit... then what's the problem? How am I holding her back from anything? I've supported her with anything and EVERYTHING she's done. Albeit, sometimes not immediately, but I supported her every time none-the-less.

I don't want to move on at all either. There's nothing better to go to. She's is honestly the most important thing in my life. She's the reason I give half a damn about my future. I only cared to succeed in anything in hopes of making her life better. I wanted nothing more than to be with her and for her to be happy. I guess I wanted too much... all I'm getting apparently is her happiness.

To make things worse... I have no way to deal with a loss like this. My friends don't care enough to give me more than 'That sucks dude.' and I don't even have anyone to give me a hug and tell me everything's going to be ok. I don't even have anything to take the situation off my mind. I'm stuck at home... with nothing to do but wonder why this has to happen to me and why my life has to suck. Meanwhile, as I type this, Suki is having fun at a party with her friends. If she needs support, she ALWAYS has it. She always has someone who cares. She even has a distraction. All I had was her.

Well, I still do have her... just not the way I had hoped and dreamed. All I can do is talk to her now. Well, not even now... I have to wait til after school tomorrow for any time at all. We're still madly in love... we remind each other constantly... even now, but apparently, that's just not enough.

It's funny... when I first came to Suki... she was a shell of what she is today. She even thanked me for making her make her life better. I never felt like she owed me either. She gave me my reason to live. I couldn't have asked for a better gift... I just wish she couldn't have taken that reason away so easily. My gift to her was permanent and she's to me... could come and go at her will.

I don't know what to do anymore. My life for over 2 years revolved around her. I've developed a physical dependency for her. She's been my reason for existing, trying, and caring. She's all I have... and I feel like I'm losing it permanently.

You know... I'm looking back at last summer. We had finally met. It was by far the happiest time of my life. Just her touching me made me feel better than anything I've ever felt. We hugged, kissed, and just plain showed each other physical love. It's something I had NEVER experienced in my life until then... I never wanted to leave and was only able to with a promise that we'd be together again. Now, I'm starting to feel like I'll never experience anything like that again. I'll never have someone hug me and hold on for the sake of pure, true love again. Well, at least, that's how I'm seeing it.

Hopefully, this break up is temporary... The possibility of such is the only reason I'm still alive now. I just wanted to be with her... and I was finally going to be... forever, but life's a bitch. Kicking me in the nuts repeatedly every time I experience joy is what I've come to expect up to now. I guess I was a fool to think things would change.

Still, I want things to be better again. I don't want to give up on life, just like I don't want to give up on her. I never will... until the day that I know I'll never have her back. When that day comes, you'll be sure to never hear from me again in any form. I, for my sake, hope that day never does come.
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Suki, don't think I hate you or think any less of you. Also, don't take what I've said as you seeming like a bad person. You're not. I love you more than anything and ALWAYS will... I'll stay available for when you come back to me. I'll be standing there with open arms. I'm sorry if this sounds selfish but... I just want to be happy and, for once, stay that way... but I'd sacrifice my happiness in less than a second if it'd make you happy. I guess that's all I truly care about... I was just always sure that you'd be happy WITH me. Don't worry, I'm not going to kill myself or anything because of this... I may WANT to... but I won't for you. Just keep in touch with me, okay? I don't want to lose you completely... it's the only thing that could kill me at this rate.

You're not even gone... and I miss you already.

In case some of you are interested in what's going on with my life and why my programming has temporarily halted.

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Well, I've officially tolerated where I live long enough.
Next September I become 18 finally.
The summer before that (this next one coming up), I plan on moving out of my house and living with my (long distance) girlfriend.

(Note: No worries, I've met her in real life last summer and we've been dating for over 2 years. Three by the time I'm 18. We're both more than convinced that we're going to be together forever, so none of this is an issue. Even her mom is in full support of our relationship... and her dad isn't as much... but he doesn't live with her and is quite insane. Everyone wants him dead. Not important though.)

Now... this doesn't seem like anything bad at all. In fact, it's a refreshing breath of air from my childhood.
Seems like a dream come true.

There is ONE issue... I'll have to plan on getting a job while attending (and hopefully passing) my senior year of high school (assuming I pass this year...).
I'll be living with her and her mom for a few years at least... but they're not exactly rolling in money.
So, I'll have to be helping a lot. Not to mention, I'll have to help with bills and food expenses while saving for college so I can get a better job and eventually a house of our own.

I'll have start-up money from friends to get there and live a month or two.
I don't know if I have my parents support yet since I don't want to worry them until I've gotten everything planned.
But, they can't stop me from going since I'll be 18.

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I've decided that no matter what... I'm following through with my plan though.
It's going to be hard... there will be bad times...
But if I stay here... I'll go insane. I know it.
I'm safer leaving.

(Please, no posting in this topic staff members.)

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It'll be easier to organize things this way.

You can get the downloads here and talk about them in the Game Info & Progress topic.

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The first attachment is the one with speed adjustments.
Slowing down the menu a bit to make it more smooth on the faster calcs.

The second is the one without the adjustments.
I want someone with a TI-83+ to test it out for me.

In the end, I just want to know which version seems smoother on the TI-83+.

(EDIT: No, I haven't upgraded the save/load system yet. Many apologies.
The new character screen took WAY too long.)

If you haven't noticed... our Male to Female ratio is 1:0.

If you somehow don't know what that means... it means everyone here is a guy.

This brings up the interesting questions:
Why?
How do we fix this?
How long were you all going to enjoy this sausage fest before telling me?!

I had to find this out for myself... D=

{This is actually a serious topic... but I just woke up so it can't be executed seriously.
Still, take the message as a serious one anyway. Thank you.}

Well, I haven't seen any good tutorials out there, so I decided to start making my own.

Unfortunately, I say things before I think so I have a lot of 'um...'s in there but I get my points across.

Anyway, right now, I'm covering the basics. (making more videos all tonight)
Though, I'll be off of that and into game making asap.

I'm not sure anything will help the members here, but hopefully... my tutorials can be given to friends and such to teach them.

Feel free to give criticism and ideas.
Also, I'll be linking the videos to Omnimaga.org so maybe we'll get new members.

Anyway, without further ado... my voice!
http://www.youtube.com/user/AnarchistProgrammer

Well... last Friday (24th?) I got a hold of Fable II. (amazing game btw)
I've almost beaten it 3 times already too.
When I'm not at school, I'm playing that (or on here, whether or not I can find anything to post about)
Well, tomorrow, I'm getting ahold of Fallout 3 as well.

Don't think I'll be doing a lot of programming/music making for awhile. x_x

Nyaar!
This is a RPG made completely with BASIC and xLIB.
It's currently compatible with the z80 series (only fully tested on the 83+, 84+ SE, and nSPIRE though).
I don't plan on making it for the more advanced series... mostly because I'd have to learn a new language.

Anyway, it has 4 basic classes, 12 advanced classes, 5 races, 4 stats, 20+ creatures, no level cap, a few items, sprited map, and well... a lot more.
Due to the popularity of "screenshots", here's one:


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Progress:

Objectives	Percent
Town	100%
Battle System	50%
Items	75%
Weapons/Armor	0%
Classes	80%
Monsters	99%
Quests	0%
World	0%

On the immediate list of things to do, I have the following:

• Fully graphical battle system. (main issue here is making the sprites, which, despite making all the one for the town, is really difficult for me)
• Abilities for classes
• Reworking of the stats system, make it slightly more complicated and capable of more customization.
• Graphical dungeon-like areas with random encounters instead of the current set-up.
• Weapons and armor (might never be implemented, depends on how the abilities and stats work out later)
• Quests (definitely needed to be added after the graphical dungeons)

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Attached is the zip folder with the programs and pictures needed. Readme included.
Please, before you ask questions, read the readme.txt file.