i know ^^ and i cant wait to see this when its done what are your plans for getting it published or somthing?

well its definetily a shorter chapter than the last one ^^
and after not having read the first chapter in a while i got confused cause you had jumped to the boys perspective

so my only critique this time is you jumped right into a large chunk of new plot with out much of a leadin idk how i would lead it in but other than that i think its good its descriptive enough and doesnt confuse me like a lot of other things i have read

the only other thing is change it from officer 1212 the use of 12 3 times in the chapter juset seems a bit odd to me 

may i suggest 13-37 (j/k)

ggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg going to read
...flip.....flip......flip....

ggggg sweet

awsome

wow thats cool

@ eeems wow awsome and what did you need >9000 objects for

@ stephan yeah please be sure your not confusing what you are talking about so far i think this is a great project . so i had to vote you down as well

if i wasnt so busy with school atm i would be willing to take a try at it
 if the info is all set already i could try to get a rtf of it idk how to make pdf though ive always had good luck with msword so